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  • Writer's pictureJuli & Thomas Hobby

3 Marriage Morning Moments

Updated: Oct 24, 2021

How do you start your morning? Do you have a routine that prepares you for the day ahead, or do you franticly jump out of bed rushing to start the business that seems to hover over you while you sleep? Have you ever stopped long enough to make mornings matter?

We recently started working on our morning moments. Routine is great, but sometimes limiting or can become an automatic failure if not followed to the second. On the flip side, no intentions in the morning can lead to laziness and nonproductiveness. We encourage you to try a few things differently in the mornings and note how you feel during the day. What helped you relax? What created focus? What made you completely stressed out?

Once noted, you’ll be able to know what you’d like to repeat, what you’d like to adjust, and what you’d like to eliminate. Set your alarm earlier than needed, have a quiet time, or blare your music. Exercise before anyone else wakes up, or make a big breakfast for the family. Whatever you need to help your personality thrive, take hold of the morning - it’s YOUR day!

Morning moments can also happen in your marriage. You not only have the opportunity to choose how YOU need to start the day for your own success; you have the privilege of also setting your spouse’s attitude for the day they have in front of them, too.

Three things we have established for our marriage morning moments…
  1. Affirm - say good morning! Whether you get up before your spouse or your alarm goes off for the both of you, our first words are important. We’ve made it a practice to roll over, give a lovely embrace, and say good morning to each other. Morning breath and all, it IS a good morning to be waking up next to the one you love; the one you get to do life with. I can be tired, grumpy, and not want to get out of bed, but when my husband and I look at each other and say “good morning”, it’s like we are speaking that into existence … that we are going to make it a good morning no matter how we feel … and that’s why we make this our first marriage morning moment.

  2. Brighten - make them smile! My husband doesn’t like coffee so this isn’t something we do together, nor do I want a non-coffee drinker to make my cup of joe. But what he DOES do in the morning is turn on the coffee machine for me. When I come downstairs to the Keurig light lit up, it makes me smile each day and makes me feel loved because it means he thought of me. All my husband had to do is push a button, but he knows this small gesture of selflessness serves me in the simplest way. This may or may not be coffee for you, but find something that your spouse would feel supported by in your marriage and make it part of your morning moments.

  3. Connect - kiss them goodbye! Mornings are rushed. They can often be found as part of the definition of insane (“in a state of mind which prevents normal perception, behavior, or social interaction”). However, how long does a kiss take? A peck on the lips is simply one second. That one second can make someone’s day! Kissing is a priority in our marriage. It doesn’t have to be a full make-out session; it just has to be a public embrace. We kiss good morning, good night, and when we are coming (hello) and going (goodbye). But I would argue the most important is the “goodbye kiss”. It communicates to your spouse that no matter how crazy our morning went, no matter how long our day is apart, no matter what life brings on the job, you are loved, you are seen, and you have someone to come home to and kiss again. The “goodbye kiss” also lets you live your life with no regrets. I’m not much of a worrywart, but I do cherish life that could be gone in an instant. Those “goodbye kisses” are so important as if it was the last thing I could give to my husband. Kissing your spouse should be part of your everyday, but if it’s not part of yours yet, don’t go another day without this marriage morning moment.

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