Money & Marriage
Couples have two different approaches to their finances. Either they combine their income or they keep their money completely split. But which way is better?
We believe that couples who don’t combine their income are more likely to end their marriage in divorce … simply because it’s an easier out!
NOT combining your money with your spouse can have these 3 lasting effects:
It builds resentment toward each other over purchases made
It divides spending power, eliminating the financial power of oneness in marriage
It can lead to things like financial infidelity (hiding money and/or purchases from the other spouse)
When you don’t combine your money, where do you draw the line?
How big is the fight if someone eats “your” Doritos?
If your spouse gets a flat tire, do you loan them the money to fix it?
Do you have them pay you back in an installment plan?
What if they don’t pay you back?
At what point do you change from a supportive spouse in loaning them the money to a debt collector?
Additionally, bill splitting also doesn’t communicate how #financial burdens will be handled in which one partner may have to financially support the other if one spouse loses a job, decides to cut back on hours, or takes a pay cut to try out a new career. And what if they leave the workforce to raise children, go back to school, care for a parent, etc.?
Luckily, there’s an alternative!
When you combine your finances as husband and wife, there’s no more splitting it down the middle … because there is NO middle!
When you DO combine your money with your spouse, you can have these 3 lasting effects:
1) It makes you a marriage partner instead of a roommate
3) It eliminates competition with each other because you’re on the same team
Maybe you do combine your #money with your spouse, but you aren’t experiencing the positive effects yet. You operate in a mindset that it’s OUR money … but do you act like that?
Our biggest practical advice is that you do a budget together. When you plan out income and expenses and then monitor it at the same time, it provides trust in your relationship. It helps you take ownership and responsibility, while still maintaining a partnership to avoid resentment.
If you need help crafting and managing a budget to help your financial and material goals align, reach out to Thomas at TMH Financial Coaching
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